#i can't seem to stop crying anymore
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fuck fuck fuck fuck everything hurts so much
ii. i need help i don't know how or why from who but i can't keep this up im in so much pain i can hardly think i can't move i can't pick anything up i can't hardly walk or. fuck
i don't know why I'm posting this please just ignore it
#i can't think hard enough to remember how to. Disable share i#ugh i hate this so much i hate it i hate it#i hate dealing with this so fucking much i can't do it#i can't take this anymore goddammit i can't do it im all alone here and i don't know how to ask for help i don't know how to tell when#someone is sick of me needing help i don't know#ffuck it hurts#It hurts so much i don't know what to do#hhhhhh#all i can do is chug medication that isn't effective and lay down and cry#i can't seem to stop crying anymore#i feel so weak and defeated and I'm so. Sso tired#Im so tired#.....pplease someone help#mmake it stop
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Sometimes I still think about The Owl House Gang all trying to watch ATLA together but then Zuko's backstory in The Storm retraumatizes Hunter so bad they have to stop
#luz is too young to have grown up with the show she just heard it was good#SHE DIDN'T KNOW GUYS#they all get super into it and the gaang and maybe even make some jokes about how Zuko reminds them of Hunter#and then suddenly it is Not Funny Anymore#they just straight up stop watching it because it was So Bad#and then months later Hunter is like '....... i really want to know where that show goes'#so they pick it up again#everytime Zuko makes a bad life decision Hunter is just dying inside#'your dad DOES NOT LOVE YOU YOU CAN DO BETTER'#season 2 is such an emotional rollercoaster#like zuko is figuring stuff out and seems like he's gonna redeem himself and everyone is getting so hype#because at this point they NEED to see this character get a happy ending because they have been throufh WAY TOO MUCH over him#and then in the season finale he regresses#the BETRAYAL#they are like wailing and rending their clothes like dudes in the bible#hunter just sitting there with his head in his hands#season 3 storyline with zuko at the fire palace is also massively triggering for him but he's being so normal about it#the rest of the squad on the copium like 'he can still turn this around guys'#secretly several of them have given up on him at this point but they can't admit that there's too much riding on this#and then zuko DOES IT but the scene is so tense that no one even feels like they can celebrate because they're all projecting way too hard#and then zuko redirects the lightning and they're like 'FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!!!'#there is much crying at the finale#luz and amity kin assigned eachother as aang and katara so they're really happy when they get together#hunter like 'mostly this is making me glad I didn't have to become the political leader of The Boiling Isles as a traumatized 16 year old'#'can you imagine'#these tags were not supposed to be this long lmao#toh#atla#avatar#my rambles
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#currently crying because I'm alone with my husband's 94 year old grandma and I'm the only one who ever lets her talk about certain topics#so she just talked about her childhood and youth for one and a half hours#which means. the war#I'm not gonna go into it but it makes me cry every time even though I've already heard it all before#how can you not cry about a child who lost two of her teenaged brothers and had to watch the third one very nearly die too#the stories about how careful they had to be because the police constantly went to every house and checked everything#how they had to hide some of the milk from their cows so they could make butter because they couldn't afford to buy it#and how dangerous that was.#idk I'm so tired of people dying over senseless and unnecessary shit forever and ever and nothing ever changes and no one ever seems#to learn from it#or at least the ones in power don't#as long as there's disposable people (men) to send to war it doesn't matter. and now that's not even necessary anymore you can just kill#people from far away and. I'm just tired#and I'll shut up now and not talk about these things again as usual. it's not because I don't care it's because it (literally) drives me#insane to think about it and I know it's weak and pathetic but I have to choose to stay just barely sane enough to stay alive#can't stop crying. 🙃#anyway. shouldn't talk about it so. bye
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Anyone else having just a few really shitty years?
Like, it keeps getting worse and you don't get to recover before more shit happens?
Just checking if this is relatable to anyone else, or if I'm completely alone.
#im really tired#the world can stop anytime#wwlll is at the door#maybe my problems will seem lesser#im maxxed out on meds#what's next?#tw: death?#i can't catch a break#i can't even cry anymore
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i've been crying so often recently it's kind of unsettling
#as soon as i'm alone with my thoughts i can tear up over anything#maybe it's the constant headache or the meds not working anymore or just the feeling of being useless#idk#i just can't seem to stop crying and it's not freeing or helpful anymore. just sad#i'm tired#chr-txt#vent
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ok very interesting quest in hsr
#theyre getting better at this writing shit#hsr spoilers#tho i think dh and jy was still kinda random lol i guess it made sense since it was a dream(?)...#i haven't seen enough people crying abt misha but to me. its sadge we can't see him on the train anymore :( but he got#his wish.... he talks abt always wanting to go on the express and traveling and he did it.... he made it!! so im happy for him :')#aven pisses me off lowkey ipc hater group. whatever tho#i like where they went w robin so now i'll just wait for sunday#also the boss design is so nice and cool and very reminscent of ena but fuck the gameplay oh my god i hated fighting sundays mecha body#so much .... i swear if robin's gonna need those materials i'll just be like . 🧍♀️#much to think about though. at the same time i actually have no idea what happened and need to read a plot summary#hsr#they also need to stop putting elements that i don't have built like genuinely besides gui.naifen and hime.ko i have 0 fire chars#and id rather not use ms train navigator bc she doesn't seem good against bosses#robin and sunday are intriguing and so is boothill.... neutral on fire.fly but i guess she's alright at least she improved from getting#murdered for shock value in 2.0#ramblings!#oh one more thing sunday apologist i dont think what he did was necessarily right i just want to chew on him like a toy#hoyo loves their characters falling out of giant robots#chicken wing boy pls be playable i'll pull he's so funky a bit in over his head but we love a biblical coded guy w savior complex#oops edit: also wtf is the state of the family rn we kinda just fought sunday fought sunday again for real this time and then he fell#and penacony went back to reality??? or what? maybe i'm not comprehending or maybe there's another part to this???????
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#ooc#vent#my brother and i got into an argument in the immediate family chat about2 hours ago and im still emotionally out of whack from it.#right now I'm struggling to feel anything but extreme dislike and coldness to him. I've felt so disrespected and unappreciated by him for.#well probably years now. a long time. and he blew up at me for no reason and basically said my autism is the problem.#something so intrinsic and unable to be separated from me is the provlem.tje thing that's been making it so harf for me for so long.#I'm sitting at work trying not to cry again as i type this .#i don't know if i will ever fully come back from this. i don't know if i *want* to try and fix things after this.#he seemed to hate me. and i dont even really care anymore. how sad is that. what hurts most is that it feels like confirmation that im#the problem. not him#me. like it always has been because ive spent most of my life undiagnosed and unknowing. suspecting but that's about it.#I'm sick and tired of not being comfortable at home. im sick and tired of being scared he'll hurt me. I'm sick and tired of him keeping#me awake at night. I'm sick and tired of him not even doing bare minimum and reaping all the rewards.#i hate how it feels like mum and dad are protecting him. how nothing ever changes and i keep trying but i can't do anything.#i can't even move out rental vacancy is less than 1% abd rents like $500+ a week.#i dont want to have to leave but i may have too just to keep my sanity and i hate it i hate it i hate it.#i hate him. i wish he would go away. i wish ue would face reak consequences and know how it feels. i wish mt sister woulf stop choosing him#like hes not the problem. i haye feeling like this.#i hate being the problem.
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-.-
#personal rant look away#.......#i feel so angry all the fucking time these days#i feel like i want to scream and shout but i can't...i just can't#my my head hearts and i feel nauseous#like i might black out .....the anger just keeps building and building and i can't seem to stop feeling this way#frankly it's tiring me so fucking much#i can really use a good long screaming session#or even a good cry#but i can't seem to bring myself to let go#i don't want to feel like this#it's making me behave all wrong....#i think i broke myself how do i fox me fick fuck fuck#gods i need therapy but i can't access it fml#and * self therapy* isn't cutting anymore#this is the shittiest I've felt this much anger and disgust#uuuuuuugh#raee in rantmode#for ts
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I'm so lonely i'm so lonely i'm so fucking lonely
#thinking about death and i'm just. crying#sometimes I finally find the perfect way to describe all of my pain in a way that'll actually make sense to someone else#and I just cry. it hurts. it hurts#of course i'm not telling anyone. but imagine getting the chance to#i'm tired of feeling the same pains over and over again#it gets old. it gets old complaining about it. people get tired of hearing it#eventually you just have to stay silent. stay silent. unnoticeable. keep your head down. never smile. never express yourself#but that ruins everything too#why can't I do anything right#what does everyone else seem to get that I don't#I shouldn't even be so afraid in the first place. it's the fact my head's not normal#everything will always break because I can't be normal#I try so hard to break the cycle or stop myself from doing what ruined everything before and it doesn't work. it doesn't work!#I just ruin everything still! nobody wants or loves you enough to deal with you! nobody can stand you!#even if they did you just wear them down until they can't anymore#nobody cares about you nobody cares if you're hurting nobody cares about your happiness nobody cares if you end up dead#everyone can see what you really are#they would laugh if they saw you die#they want you to die. just give them what they want. this is the best for everyone. things aren't better because you haven't done it#I have dreams of people I know murdering me raping me telling me to kill myself walking on my corpse#I feel like an object. a bug. am I even real? what am i? why do I exist? why is this happening? why does my head hurt?#god doesn't like who I am either#just swallow them down. swallow them down and nothing will be wrong
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I wonder if I'm makin things better or worse for the collective bein like this. On one hand I'm not happy or makin any progress towards it, but...I can't rly even imagine that. I can't imagine a life without him. It's not that I don't want it, on some level I know it'd be better for me, but...I can't even dream about it cause I just can't imagine it at all.
On the other hand I make a great decoy. He's basically dropped all interest in Angel cause now he knows I'm the one who still wants him n loves him n can't exist without him. So at least one of us will make it out this time, I think.
#mafia honey#it's not a self-sacrificing thing. i'd stay all the same even if it did nothin for anyone else. but it's nice that it does!#at least some good that'll come out of this fucking mess#whatever happens to me is.....i mean it'd happen anyway. i'm neither ready or strong enough to try n get away. i don't rly even want to#i'd rather just stick around n trick myself into thinkin maybe someday he'll care about me too#i guess i make a pretty good pet too. i don't rly talk back anymore or get angry or say no. i don't make a fuss about much.#n i mean....contract or no the chain's still there. he knows it i know it there's no place far enough that he couldn't pull me right back in#nothin out here for me anyway. all i do is abuse substances n cry. at least this way i can just go to val instead of wrecking the body too#or just self soothe w/ the most horrific violent abusive scenarios i can think up. or the care i can pretend comes after#cause in reality he's been rly skimpin on the aftercare lately n that's. not great. makes the inevitable crash a whole lot worse#it's like he looked at the list of what NOT to do in a dynamic like this n made it his how-to guide instead...#though it's probably just all part of the game. needs to keep us low enough that we don't get too strong n start gettin ideas.#needs to keep us desperate enough that we keep comin back instead cause nothin else gives us the rush like he does#i think i saw the term for that recently. breadcrumbing? maybe#i can see what he's doin i know all the steps by now but i'm just lettin it play out anyway#not like i could stop it anyway. he knows everythin. he knows what i feel better than i do#plus if he doesn't he can just make it up n convince me he's right cause i can't tell the difference#¯\_(ツ)_/¯ it is what it is. at least angel n silk seem to be breakin free of it now. i'm not around that much anyway#spdrvent
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God and I thought I was exaggerating when I said my mental issues started at 14
#why is this thirteen year old crying in voice memos while simultaneously doing a shitty improv songs about#sorry#This memo is over ten minutes#i can't believe I was suicidal way back then#'when I'm gone if I do I want you to know it's because I love you *sob* and I se your life would be so much happier with me*#*without#'we both know it's true'#HAVEN SHUT UP GOD YOU'RE THIRTEEN#NO#STOP APOLOGIZING IN STUPID SONG IN UR VOICE MEMOS ASKING WHY DOES MY MOM NOT LOVE ME ANYMORE#THATS SO SAD WHAT THE FUCK STOP CRYING NO OW#YOU POOR KID#THATS NOT ME I'M NOT ACKNOWLEDGING IT WTF#I MISS THE KING SHIT U WERE UP TO PRE COVID#GIVE ME EARLY JANUARY 2020 HAVEN SAYING 'the year has sucked and It seems like the next two months might be one of those days but nonethele#I feel like this is gonna be a good year'#THAT WAS HILARIOUS MAKE MOUTH SOND STIMS INTO MIC AGAIN#i really like singing guys it's therapeutic and I was much less reserved at 13#The point wasn't to make music I swear#God it's so bad#But FUCKING TELLING#god based on the way it cut off I probably got scolded after that
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need someone older.
(teacher!coriolanus × student!reader.)
summary: a teacher can do a lot in private lessons.
c.w: reader is 19 for repeating a year, age gap (coryo's 29), fingering, tummy bulge, heavy smut, edging (f. recieving), overstimulation, stuffed panties, mild public sex, petnames (coryo calls reader bunny, pet, good girl.), reader thinks coryo is married so . cheating implications, marriage proposal
being a dumb girl was something you tried your best to do ever since you repeated the first year of high school, watching all your friends graduating before you was something you weren't proud about- not for them, but for you. you were supposed to be by their side.
thankfully, you had your professor, coriolanus snow. god. he was the only reason for you to pay attention to class (or at least try to), you were hungry for his approval. for you to be called a "good girl", and be said that you've done well in your tests? yeah, you were willing to do anything for that.
when he offered you private classes, you said yeah without even thinking much. you needed to learn, and spending more time with him was something you craved for. the ring on his finger? fuck it. you wanted it. you deserved it. more than his wife – if he had one.
you've been day dreaming about it constantly, eyes always searching for his on every class you had with him, and he would keep that smile painted on his face, not wanting anyone to think you were the reason for him to be smiling, even if you were, the didn't need to know about it.
"bunny," he voiced, leaning on your desk and taking advantage of the fact that you both were on the library, every student on the school had gone home and the teachers had gathered to go to a nearby bar. "stop looking at my dick now, will we?" he said, chuckling at you.
"huh?" you asked, finally waking to your reality.
"you need to learn that if you don't want to repeat a grade again." he said, sitting by your side, his hand holding your thigh. "you don't want to repeat now, do you?" you shaked your head negatively, and he loved seeing you like that, shy as a kitten even if you usually had his dick on your mouth when that used to happen. "c'mon, don't look at me like that. we have to put these things on your brain if you want to graduate already." he said.
his fingers slowly travelled all the way up on your panties, finding a small damp on the fabric, he looked at you with his usual smirk, his pupils blown already from everything he was about to do to you.
and now you looked like a mess. hands gripping on the library desk as your legs trembled with the aftermath of every time you almost came. you counted six till now, crying from how good it felt having him behind you, his fingers thrusting lewdly into your cunt.
"c-coryo- t-teacher, please. please stop it, i have to cum- i can't hold it in anymore!" you begged, clenching as his fingers rubbed deliciously on your clit after thrusting so many times inside you.
"well, it's not my fault, pet. you're the one getting your questions wrong." he said, pulling his dick to tease the core of your pussy, your cries only making him feel and making his ego bigger. "tell me, baby, how do you want it?"
"q-quick, pleease! if it get slower i-i think i'll die!" you said, legs spread as your skirt revealed a small part of your ass.
"oh, c'mon, i'm sure you can take it, baby" he purred in your ear, the tip of his cock teasing your pussy and slapping your clit slightly, making your body jolt slightly. you bend over, your elbows being now your main support at that table.
"please, teacher..!" you begged. but he didn’t even bat an eye to your cries, slowly sliding his dick inside you, and fuck, you both fucked on wednesday, how come he always seems to stretch you up so good? the pace he choose to torture you with was so slow, making sure you felt every inch of his dick inside you, stretching you, making you his. "please, don't do that to me. j-just ask something easier!" you cried.
"easier? okay... let's see" his hips bucked slowly into yours, your pussy gushing around him as if your own body needed that- as if he was the hair you breathed for. "what's your age, babe?" he asked, a playful tone being cast as his free hand massaged your boob, pinching on your nipple and freeing both your boobs from it's cage.
"n-nineteen." you said, and he laughed again as he said: "good girl, you're right.", his hips giving you a powerful thrust that made you cum with only that, making you cry from your own humiliation.
"ah, bunny, don't tell me you came already only with that." he said, joking with your face as you cried.
"i'm sorry- too good. i-it was too deep." he laughed, pulling back and thrusting deeper again, this time, you made sure not to cum again, edging yourself as he changed your position to put your leg over his broad shoulder, his dick making a bulge appear at your tummy. he loved that view- much more than he loved you.
"look at you, taking me so well. how does it feel, baby? use one of the words we learned at the literature class," he grunted your tightness coating his dick with your own juices, "use them, even if it's just two, and i'll let you cum."
"tortuous," you begin, crying from how good it felt, from how dumb you were getting. "spiralling, it's twirling my insides!" you cried. and he smilled, kissing and licking your tears before placing the most gentle kiss on your lips, pouding faster into you as you closed your eyes shut, moaning and grunting from all the pleasure- and yet you tried your best to avoid moaning only to hear his moans and the sounds of flesh slapping against flesh.
"good girl." he said, his hands holding your hips as he fucked you. it felt truly out of your world experience. his phone ringed just at the right moment he hit your cervix. "t-teacher, your phone- it can be your wife." you said, earning a frown from him as he turned the phone off.
"wife? baby, i'm single." he said, chuckling at you. "you've been walking around school with my cum stuffed in your panties even thought you thought i was married?" he pounded into you with a more quicken pace. "god, what a dirty girl you are. fucking around with married teachers." he teased you.
you felt a heat on your cheeks that you never felt before. god, how much would you end up humiliating yourself? "b-but, fuck! y-your ring-"
he showed you the ring. taking it off his finger with his mouth and sticking his tongue to you, an invitation for you to take the ring.
"keep it." he said once you took the ring
"but- s-sir, i-"
"mm, bunny, i'm a faithful man." he said. "and right now, i'm faithful to you." he said. you squirmed deliciously at the feeling of his cock filling you up again, his tip on your cervix as you came again, and soon enough, he came too.
he helped you get dressed into your panties again and straightned your clothes, a cast kiss on your lips before he smiled sweetly at you, putting the ring on your middle finger.
"i hope you know what that means."
"i-i do." you said, for both questions heavily implied in that context.
"great. then make sure to graduate, bunny." he smiled. "i'm sure the honeymoon will be great."
#coriolanus snow x reader#young coriolanus snow#young president snow#tbosas smut#the hunger games the ballad of songbirds & snakes#coriolanus snow fanfiction#coriolanus snow imagine#coriolanus x reader#coriolanus x you#x reader#teacher crush#teacher x student#dark!coriolanus snow
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Don't They Know a Rabbit Can't Cry
Synopsis: while travelling the witches' road you're forced to confront the two witches who left you centuries ago without an explanation.
Pairing: Agatha Harkness x fem!reader x Rio Vidal
Words: 2.3k+
WARNINGS - swearing, choking, knives, nightmares, brief mentions of burning and being buried alive and playful use of 'mommy'
It's a quiet evening as you pluck wildflowers in the wake of the setting sun. You would have to head home soon; to avoid the danger of navigating your way back in the dark. The older witch did not like you being out alone at night but you weren't quite done yet. The bouquet had to be perfect. Not that she would ever say otherwise. not to you anyway. Too soft. Too sweet. She had a soft spot for you. They both did. You twist the delicate stem between your fingers. Lavender. Beautiful. Intoxicating. And... hot. Sizzling against the pad of your pointer finger and thumb. And searing into the skin. You drop it quickly. Flames swallowing the single flower. Bizarre. You take another. plucking it from its spot. Flames shoot up from the ground surrounding you entirely. Red hot and roaring as the flowers make way for beautiful flames that dance in the breeze. Creeping closer and closer. Quicker and quicker. Until you feel it burn against your skin.
You jolt up. Sweaty and warm in the night's cold embrace. You're safe. Right now at least. No fire. No nothing. You rub your temple. Just a nightmare. They'd been more frequent as of late. Little flashes of the past engulfed in fiery fury. Fitting. The makeshift campsite was still. The ashes of the small fire dance in the breeze. Witches litter the ground in a moment of respite. You didn't know them but you imagine they're quite desperate. Most weren't brave enough to even dare travel the witches' road anymore. Pushing up you decide to go for a walk. Not far just enough to feel the cool air and calm your heart. Away from prying eyes. There wasn't much around here anyway.
"can't sleep?" it's a startling thing. To hear such a familiar sound so abruptly. It brings with it a quickened heart. A look of surprise. that voice. An unpleasant reminder of the past. That's all this trip seemed to be. A constant trip down memory lane. In many ways, you wish you had never agreed but maybe your darkened heart may still hold a few soft spots.
"just needed a minute alone,"
"That's a dangerous game around here," there is a playfulness to her tone. one that makes your jaw tense.
"can you just go away?" you ask. "I can't- I can't deal with this right now."
"playing hard to get?" just as playful but different. Still familiar. Annoyingly so. "what happened to that sweet girl who brought me flowers every day."
"don't," a threat. You wished not to relive the past right now. Not with them. They didn't deserve to remember you so fondly.
"made us little flower crowns." her voice travelled the woods. Surrounding you from all directions. Trapping you in your spot.
"stop."
"used to bring us fresh bread."
"fuck off," you bite back with an equally sharp turn. Subdued anger began to rise at the mere sight of them. Agatha Harkness. The harbinger of your nightmares. The years had been kind to her appearance but if rumours are to be believed she had a dark reputation. Evil. Soulless. Murderer. Maybe in another lifetime, you would have disagreed. A green witch stood to her side. Far enough away for you to know they weren't on good terms either. She sported a signature smirk you wanted to slap away. Rio Vidal. Infuriating in every conceivable way. They both brought different feelings. Similar but still different. "why can't you just leave me alone?
"we're only checking on you, dear,"
"After such a scary nightmare." Rio teased. "do you need to get in mommy's bed tonight?"
You take a deep breath. Don't raise to her level. Don't give her the satisfaction. It's not quite admitting defeat but you're tired. Falling against a nearby tree. "please leave." you let your head fall back against the bark.
"I'm sure Agatha won't mind,"
"leave the poor girl alone," as always Agatha comes in to mediate. It's always just a little misleading. The woman crouches down before you. Glassy eyes bore into yours and for a moment you're that girl again. The one they remember. Who picked flowers and planned picnics? Ran in the meadow and liked to sit at the edge of the lake. Who held on tight to Agatha's hand as she walked you home. You didn't have much back then. Lived in a small cottage in the woods with your family. The older witch came into your life so abruptly. Looking back on it now she probably just saw a naive girl she could play with. "are you okay?" her question brings you back to reality. The here and now. Stuck on the road with a bunch of washed-up witches and the two people you hate most in the world. Stuck in a never-ending cycle of reliving the past. The end seemed so far away. Who knows if you'll even make it that far with this useless bunch. "do you wanna tell us about it?"
"Agatha," said softly.
"yes, dear?"
"fuck. Off." quiet but firm. You can tell she wasn't expecting it. A little chuckle sounds from behind her. The witch raises.
"fine." Agatha answers. "forgotten how stubborn you can be." your eyes trail after her as she begins to walk away, Rio takes a moment before following. And the question that has been bubbling in your chest for centuries finally comes up.
"Why did you leave me?" they slow to a stop. Yet to turn back. Did you even really want to know the answer? Perhaps it was a question best left unanswered. Years of bitterness already seeped into your bones. Little to be said to make you less angry at them. Less murderous rage. "what did I do?"
"Nothing," Agatha urges. Short and simple. No explanation needed apparently. "don't stay up too late,"
"then why?" you asked again. a little louder. A little firmer. Why was she acting like this? Pretending she cared. It was infuriating.
"Just tell her," Rio presses, turning back to you.
"don't," Agatha places her hand on Rio's shoulder but that doesn't stop the green witch from sulking towards you. A malicious little smile.
"come on, look at her," a knife pointed in your direction as she makes her way over. "just as pitiable as she always has been." she crouches down in front of you much like Agatha had before. But you don't see that girl you once were. Her eyes fill you with anger. It's strange to think you used to admire her so. Used to put flowers in her hair, and she let you. The tip of her blade forces your head up ever so slightly. "A pathetic little girl. Scared of the world," a sharp pain. You swallow hard "scared of anything real."
"Rio," Agatha walks up, towering over you two. "put it away,"
"Why should I?" she wonders. Pressing a little harder. "tell her."
"What happened to you?" Agatha questions. Your eyes flicker up to her. Did she really want to know or was it diversion. "where does this hate come from?"
"you left me," you reply. A loud bark of laughter from Rio as her blade lowers.
"no," the woman shakes her head slowly. "that's... not it."
"boring," Rio groans loudly. "I didn't lie, y'know? I know you don't want to believe me but it's true. Isn't it Agatha?" the woman rises to her feet. Patting the other witch on the shoulder. "we left because you were weak."
"it... it wasn't quite like that," Agatha offers out a hand. You brush it off, standing up. "we thought you'd be better off."
"alone?"
"without us." Agatha corrects. "you were so..." her eyes trail over you. "different back then. You didn't know you were a witch. You were just so..."
"innocent," Rio insists.
"no- well, yes but not in the way you might think. You just needed a push and we were being so careful,"
"soft," Rio interjects once more.
This little game of back-and-forth was cute. But you didn't care. Rio was using it as an excuse to get some sick sense of pleasure from throwing in insults while Agatha was doing anything to avoid saying what she thought. You knew Agatha. She could be just as mean as Rio. "can you get to the point?"
"you already know," you ignore Rio, looking straight at Agatha.
"We wanted to protect you," you can't help but roll your eyes. That was the best excuse she could come up with. Some fairytail bullshit. "felt easier to leave." you glance at Rio who looked just as over it as you did.
"Agatha thought you'd be better off without us. That we shouldn't be dragging you into a world you weren't ready for. Blah blah blah. Too weak to come with us. If we left you wouldn't get caught up in anything bad,"
"Rio was actually the one who didn't want to go,"
"Whatever," she huffs. Her gaze down at the knife in her hand; twisting the edge against the tip of her forefinger. "I thought it'd be worse if we just left you. that it'd fuck with you- we just needed to be harsher."
"but I was right,"
"you were wrong," Rio answers.
"How? I mean look at her," Agatha ushers towards you. "a full-fledged witch. Survived centuries. That's something. You didn't need us."
"do you wanna tell her or should I?" you wonder if Rio is genuine in her question or if this was just another attempt at teasing. This conversation had mainly been between the two of them.
"Tell me what?"
"I wasn't... okay, Agatha," you admit for perhaps the first time ever out loud. Only Rio knows what happened to you in the years between them leaving and the last time you saw her. You made sure of that. The two of them had grand legacies but you wanted to be forgotten in history. Like the legend of Bloody Mary. Not a sole dare speaks your name anymore because who knows what'll happen if you show up.
"oh bunny," a pet name you hadn't heard in a very long time. It almost seemed childish now. Pathetic. "just talk to me."
"you don't care,"
"god do I have to do everything around here," Rio complains. "she was tried as a witch, Agatha. Use your head for once."
"Rio," you huff.
She rolls her eyes. "burned at the stake."
"Rio," you snarl. "stop. I don't wanna talk about it."
"yes you do," she responds sharply. "you want nothing more than to make Agatha Harkness feel guilty for leaving you. Hurt her the way she hurt you." you dart for her in one swift motion. A hand around her neck. The teasing just becoming too much, and you were sick of hearing her talk.
"you hurt me too," you bark, shoving her against the nearest tree. What should be fear is instead a small smirk and dark eyes.
"fiesty," she quips. She knows you won't kill her. You can't.
"you're the only person to ever leave a mark." you resume. "an ugly scar that my body just refuses to heal."
"come on sweet one." you drive a little harder. "make it hurt."
"do you know what it's like to be tied up and buried in a coffin? To slowly suffocate to death over and over and over again," fingernails dig into the skin of her neck. You can see it's having an effect. The wobble in her smile. "the way your body screams for oxygen. Your insides burning with desire but there is nothing you can do?"
"drop her," Agatha's hand reaches your shoulder and your powers kick in. Your free hand waves her away. Energy blasts her backwards and she stumbles to the ground. A lesser witch wouldn't know of Agatha's ability to drain magic but you were smarter than that. careful in your use despite the speed. control what's around her rather than directly blasting her.
"don't touch me," you growl.
"our... little girl... is all grown... up," choked out of Rio's mouth. You watch her grow a little paler. A little more starved for breath. And then you drop her. She crumbles to the floor. "and filled..." she coughs. "with... murderous rage... apparently."
"calm down," Agatha tries from her place on the floor, as she tries to get up. You use your magic to help her up. Leaving her hovering just a few feet off the ground.
"y'know, when they dragged me from bed and burned me at the stake all I could think about was you two. Surely, they didn't just leave without a word. They'll... come back and help me." you can still picture that night. The confusion. the heat. The pain. "you left me," you walk towards Agatha. "and look at you now. The great Agatha Harkness is completely powerless."
"we're sorry, okay- aren't we rio?" rio shrugs a little. With a heavy sigh, you drop Agatha to the ground. "you've come a long way bunny."
"wasn't really a choice,"
"Can we just backtrack a little," the older witch requests. Brushing herself off as she stands back up.
"immortality looks good on you," Rio teases. You hold up a middle finger.
"you're immortal?"
"for the longest time, I thought one of you cursed me with it. Some fucked up way of protecting me. But then I went looking for you. Heard all about your extra circular activities. Witch killer, hiding behind dark magic," Agatha just looks back as you turn to Rio. She knew the story. "Rio was easier to find,"
"should have stayed dead," Rio insisted, the cold metal blade dancing across the scar on your neck. "how easier that would be," you shove her away and she just chuckles. "oh how I missed this," she wonders over to were Agatha is stood.
"I'm going back to sleep," you announce. "let's just leave it at that,"
"Why did you come," Agatha asks. You wonder if it's worth the conversation. The headache of continuing to engage with them. "if you hate me so much?"
"to die," you say eventually as you head back to camp.
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ONE, TWO, THREE...
✦SUMMARY
╰┈➤ your boyfriend choso gets the worst possible case of cuteness aggression at the wrong time...
✦C.W
╰┈➤ overstimulation, vaginal penetration, switch?choso, virgin!choso, established relationship, unprotected sex, creampie, size kink idk, crying, this is pure smut enjoy, chubby reader appreciation, praise, 652 words, corruption kink prolly, reposted
"Hug-uhhh, hu-gh... ha-agh.. agh..."
Choso's chest heaved as he gulped in the thick, humid air, his lungs burning with each ragged breath. Sweat poured down his face, stinging his eyes, mingling with the tears of overwhelming pleasure that streamed freely. He felt drunk on sensation, intoxicated by the exquisite tightness engulfing his aching cock.
This was madness, this insatiable hunger consuming him. This was his first time, no, second, (third?) time inside you. It didn't matter. All he knew is that he wanted, needed, his fourth. Sixth?
He gazed down at you, his vision blurred with adoration and lust. He must've have had the cutest girlfriend ever.
You was a vision, a goddess, sprawled out beneath him in utter submission. Your body was marked by his passion - teeth marks blooming on the soft skin, on the rolls of your doughy hips produced by the position he kneaded you in. He had you curled in on yourself, knees tucked under your chin, your watery gaze hidden beneath your arms.
Choso's gaze was drawn downward, captivated by the erotic sight of his thick cock that disappeared into your tight, cum-filled pussy. The delicate folds stretched obscenely around his girth, still puffy and glistening from the intense preparation it had taken to work him inside you. Each clench of your velvety walls sent ripples along his shaft, coaxing out more of his seed to ooze out around him.
Oh fuck... fuck, you were so adorable. What was that human saying? You were so adorable...
"...I could eat you up," he whimpered out loud, his head cloudy, raining his pleasure. "I wanna... Please..."
Choso's body pressed against yours, his skin slick with sweat, his muscles taut with exertion. He drove his cock deeper into you, filling you completely, stretching you to your limits. You gasped, a cry of pleasure and pain escaping your lips as he hit a spot deep inside that sent shockwaves of ecstasy through your body.
He rocked his hips as he nibbled pathetically at your neck, grinding against your cervix. The wet squelch of his cock churning through the copious fluids inside you was positively obscene. "Please... I wanna... Hum-gh! I can't..."
His body was on fire, every nerve ending screaming with sensation. His cock throbbed and pulsed within you, begging for release, for the sweet relief of orgasm. He couldn't stop, wouldn't stop. It felt like his very existence depended on this moment, on this connection between you two. He needed his fifth. Or his Seventh.
Choso's lips trailed down your neck, leaving a path of searing kisses in their wake. He nibbled and bit at your collarbone, savoring the taste of your skin, the saltiness of your sweat. His hands found your breasts, kneading and squeezing the soft flesh, his fingers pinching and rolling your nipples until they were hard enough for him to suck on them.
The sensation sent jolts of electricity straight to your core, causing your inner walls to clench and flutter around his throbbing length.
"Choso!" you cried out, your voice high and breathy with pleasure. The sound of his name on your lips seemed to drive him wild, and he let out a low, almost pained groan against your skin.
He couldn't take it anymore, the overwhelming sensations threatening to consume him entirely. Your body was like a drug, and he was hopelessly addicted. With a growl of desperation, he began to move again, his hips snapping forward in a frenzied rhythm that bordered on animalistic.
The bed creaked and groaned beneath you as he pounded into you with reckless abandon, his thrusts lifting your hips off the mattress with each powerful stroke. It was almost too much, the pleasure bordering on pain, but you couldn't bring yourself to ask him to stop.
Instead, you met his movements with your own, rolling your hips.
You could've sworn it was night. So why was the sun peeking through your curtains, highlighting your debauchery?
#choso#choso x reader#choso x you#choso kamo#choso kamo x reader#choso smut#jjk#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#choso kamo x female reader#choso x female reader#─𝖌𝖆𝖘𝖕!.✦#─𝕳𝖎𝖒𝖇𝖔𝖘.✦
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Stray Kids Reaction || You Find Out You're A Bet
⤜Copyright: © DreamEscapesWriting - August 2024
⤜MASTERLIST
A/n: before i get messaged about letting them “walk all over the reader” in order for it to have a fluffy ending there needs to be some give and take.
CHAN:
You weren't even sure why you were at the party in the first place, Chan told you it was just going to be for ten minutes but you'd been wandering around for almost an hour completely alone now. Pulling out your phone, you were contemplating calling a cab when you heard faint voices approaching you in the garden. Curious, you stay hidden behind the tall bushes, not wanting to intrude but unable to move away from them. The voices become clearer, and you recognize them immediately—Minho and Hyunjin, two of Bang Chan's closest friends. Hyunjin was even in your art class.
"I can't believe Chan actually agreed to that bet," Hyunjin says, his tone filled with disbelief. Minho chuckles a little and shakes his head, he never would have expected it to have happened.
"Yeah, who would've thought? But he's pulling it off. YN doesn't suspect a thing." Your heart stops. The blood in your veins turns to ice as you strain to hear more, hoping against hope that you've misunderstood what they were saying. Your stomach felt as though it was going to drop out of your ass.
"Do you think he'll actually go through with it?" Hyunjin asks, looking at Minho with an uneasy look on his face. Chan wasn't known to be mean or malicious and maybe it wasn't a malicious thing they'd set him up to do...In fact, their friend seemed happy around you.
"I don't know. He seemed pretty determined to prove us wrong. But you know how Chan is—always needing to be the best at everything." Minho laughed softly and you felt like the ground had opened up beneath you. A bet. To get with you. Your vision blurs as tears sting your eyes. You can't stand to hear anymore. You step back, accidentally snapping a twig underfoot. The sound is loud in the stillness, and you curse under your breath.
"Did you hear that?" Hyunjin says, and you know you need to leave. Now.
Without thinking, you turn and run, the party forgotten, your heart shattered. You just ran and ran until you found yourself back at your dorms.
How could he? You trusted him. You liked him. You thought he liked you too. The memories of your time together, the laughter, the stolen glances, all feel like cruel jokes now. It wasn't as though it was just a few dates, it was three whole fucking months!
You didn't know how long you'd been sitting in your dorm, wrapped in your misery, but eventually, you heard footsteps approaching before your door opened, you hated that you'd given him a key. You look up to see Bang Chan, his face etched with worry and desperation.
"YN," he calls out softly, hesitating a few feet away as if he's afraid you'll run again, the boys told him what happened and he instantly needed to find you.
"Please, let me explain." You shake your head, standing up, your stomach flipping as you try to speak without crying. You didn't want to give him that satisfaction.
"There's nothing to explain, Chan. I heard everything. It was all a bet to you. Yn, the big fucking joke," Your voice cracked at the end and Chan took a step closer, his eyes pleading with yours as he shakes his head at you.
"No, it wasn't. It started that way, yes, but it's not like that anymore. I swear." His own voice broke this time as he reached out to take your hands but you snatched them away from his reach.
"How am I supposed to believe you?" you ask, your voice breaking as tears streamed down your cheeks.
"Everything feels like a lie now." You breathed out. This time Chan closes the distance between you, his hands trembling as he reaches out to touch your arm.
"Because I fell for you, YN. For real. Somewhere along the way, the bet stopped mattering. You became the only thing that mattered." You search his eyes, looking for any sign of deceit, but all you see is the sincerity and pain he'd caused you. You want to believe him, but your heart is still raw, you didn't want him to be able to walk right over you but you'd fallen for him too.
"Give me a chance to make it right," he pleads, his voice barely above a whisper.
"I'll do whatever it takes to prove to you that this is real...That how I feel about you isn't some kind of joke and I'm utterly in love with you. I can't lose you over a stupid mistake." You hesitate, the battle between your heart and mind raging on, your mind screaming at you not to be stupid but your heart is beating it, fighting it tooth and nail to get him back.
Finally, you take a shaky breath look at him and nod your head.
"One chance, Chan. But if you hurt me again, we're done." Your voice came out stern as you told him, there was no way you were going to let him take advantage of you in any way. Relief practically washed over his face as he nodded,
"I promise, I won't." Chan looked at you for confirmation before stepping closer, wrapping you in a gentle hug. You whimpered a little before letting yourself melt into him, feeling the warmth and steadiness of his heartbeat against your cheek. It doesn't erase the pain not even close, but it's a start and Chan was going to prove to you every single day how much you meant to him. More than some ever silly bet.
As he holds you, whispering apologies and reassurances, you just close your eyes, enjoying the closeness between you both
MINHO:
Tonight was your birthday party, kind of. You were sharing it with a couple of other people from your class in University and Minho had thrown it for you. It was also to celebrate your anniversary with one another.
"I'll be right back." You whisper to Minho, quickly kissing his cheek and going to get you both a drink from the kitchen but as you walk you feel someone watching you and it doesn't take long until, Seungmin approaches you, with a look of irritation on his face.
"Hey, YN, can we talk for a minute?" He grumbles a little and you frown. You and Seungmin had only ever talked in passing whenever you were with Minho and he happened to be around. The two of you weren't the chatting type...with each other at least. You nod, curious about what he had to say to you alone. Without another word, he leads you to a quieter corner of the garden, away from the noise of the party.
"What's up?" you ask, trying to read his expression but it was blank, almost as if he didn't want to give anything away to you. Seungmin crosses his arms, clearly agitated by something.
"Look, you deserve to know something. Minho didn't start dating you because he liked you. It was a bet. He wanted to prove he could make anyone fall for him." The words were so cold coming from his lips and your heart stopped, the words hitting you like a punch to the gut as you shook your head.
"What are you talking about?" He sighs, running a hand through his hair clearly not in the mood for this anymore.
"It was just a stupid bet between him and the guys. But now, he’s acting all lovey-dovey, and it's like he actually fell for you. It's annoying." Did he sound annoyed at you for it? As if it was your fault, HIS friend had fallen in love.
You feel a wave of emotions crash over you—hurt, anger, disbelief, everything hitting you all at once. Why the fuck he was telling you this now was beyond you.
"Why are you telling me this?" You snap at him,
"Because it's ridiculous," Seungmin says, his tone sharp.
"He was supposed to prove a point, not fall in love. It's pathetic." he looked you up and down in disgust and you pulled your arms around your body, trying to shield yourself as if his words were actually hitting you physically. You don't bother to wait to hear more you march back into the party, searching for Minho. You find him laughing with some friends, completely unaware of the storm brewing inside you. You grab his arm and pull him aside, the anger bubbling up to the surface.
"YN, what's wrong?" he asks, concern flashing in his eyes, his hands holding onto you as you shake your head. Taking in a deep breath, trying to keep your voice steady you stared at him.
"Is it true?" You didn't say anything else and Minho frowned,
"Is what true, baby?" He reached out to touch your face but you moved away from him, glaring at him.
"Did you start dating me because of a bet?" His face pales, and you see the guilt written all over it, his stomach twisting itself into knots.
"Who told you that?" He whispered, not even denying the claim.
"So, it is true," you say, your voice breaking as tears spilt down your cheeks.
"I can't believe you, Minho. I thought you cared about me." You grumbled, shoving against his shoulders but he didn't even move, he just stayed in place.
"I do care about you," he says desperately, reaching for your hand but you yanked it away from him.
"It started as a bet, yes, but that changed. I changed. I fell for you, YN. For real. This is fucking real!" He yells at you as he reaches for you once again. But his betrayal was cutting you deep.
"How am I supposed to believe that? How am I supposed to trust you?! This whole time, was any of it real?" You were sobbing by now and people were starting to stare but you didn't care. He steps closer to you, his eyes pleading.
"Yes, it was real. Every moment we spent together, every laugh, every kiss—it was real. I know I messed up, but please, give me a chance to make it right." His voice was soft as he begged you to let him prove himself to you. You stare into his eyes, searching for the truth, you always thought you could read him easily but now you weren't even sure.
The hurt is still raw, but beneath it, you see the sincerity and regret written all over his face.
"How can I trust you again, Minho?" Your voice came out weak and when he reached to take your hand in his, you let him. He stared at you as he smiled, holding your hands tightly.
"I'll do whatever it takes to prove to you that I'm serious. I love you, YN. I was an idiot to ever make that bet, but I swear, you mean everything to me now." He whispers, one of his hands reaching up and cupping your face in his hands, stroking your cheek gently with his thumb. You want to believe him, but the pain is still fresh in your mind.
"It's going to take time, Minho. I can't just forget about this." You gestured between you but he nodded, laying his forehead against yours,
"I understand," he says softly.
"I'll wait as long as it takes. Just don't walk away from us...Please" You take a deep breath, the anger starting to ebb away, leaving behind a fragile hope that this would work between you, that there was a future here.
"Okay. But you have to be honest with me. No more lies." He nods, relief flooding his features as he practically yanks you into his chest.
"No more lies. I promise."
CHANGBIN:
Sitting in the middle of your history lecture, you find it increasingly difficult to focus, your new professor had a one-tone voice and you could feel yourself drifting off the longer he spoke. Sighing a little to yourself you reached into your bag for your phone. It had been buzzing non-stop for the last twenty minutes and you wanted to see what was happening. As you pulled it out a flurry of notifications began lighting up the screen. When the professor turns to write on the board, you sneak a glance at your phone, trying to figure out what was happening so much that needed this much attention on the matter.
Your heart sinks as you see a string of messages and missed calls from friends. One message catches your eye: a screenshot from an unknown number. You glanced up to make sure the professor was still busy and you caught the look of some of the girls in your class who were looking at you with pity, smiling weakly as they turned away from you.
Frowning you turned back to your phone to open the message, and your stomach dropped. The screenshot shows a group chat where Changbin discusses a bet with his friends—apparently to prove he could make you fall for him. The date on the message is from several months ago, shortly before you started dating.
Your heart races and a wave of nausea washes over you, your skin starting to sweat as you panicked more and more. You feel eyes on you as you hastily gather your things and leave the classroom, needing to get away from the prying gazes and the oppressive silence. The professor called for you but you didn't even give him a glance as you legged it down the hallway, trying to get away. It felt like all eyes were on you.
As soon as you are alone outside of Changbin's dorm, you dial Changbin's number with trembling fingers. He answers on the second ring, his voice bright and cheerful.
"Hey, baby! What's up?" What's up?! How could he even be so fucking calm about this?
"We need to talk. Now," you say, struggling to keep your voice steady. Maybe he didn't know that the photos were going "viral" around the college yet.
"Sure, where are you? I'll come to you." You could hear him moving to get his keys but you sniffled a little.
"I'm outside your dorm," you reply before hanging up, not giving him a chance to say anything else to you.
You pace back and forth, the minutes stretching out painfully. Finally, you see Changbin approaching, a concerned look on his face.
"YN, what's wrong? You look-" You hold up your phone, cutting him off midsentence, showing him the screenshot. "
What is this, Changbin? Did you make a bet about dating me?" You couldn't stop the hurt in your voice as you stared at him. Waiting for him to deny it, to say it was fake. Anything. Just to tell you that the two of you were real despite what that fucking thing said. His eyes widen, and you see the colour drain from his face.
"YN, I can explain—" You cut him off, your voice shaking with anger and hurt.
"Explain what? That our entire relationship is based on a bet? That I've been nothing but a game to you? That I'm the biggest fucking joke to you?!" You cry softly,
"That nothing between us was ever fucking real?" You finish as he shakes his head at you,
"No, it wasn't like that," he says, his voice desperate as he reaches for you.
"It started as a stupid bet, but I swear, I fell for you. For real. You're not a game to me, what I feel for you isn't a game...It isn't fake..."
"Am I supposed to get on my knees and thank you for it? I-I'm not some kind of fucking joke!" You yell at him, gaining the attention of passersby but you didn't give a shit.
"How am I supposed to believe that?" you snap, tears welling up in your eyes. "Everything feels like a lie now." He takes a step closer, his hands reaching out to you as you let him touch you.
"Please, YN, you have to believe me. I was an idiot, and I made a mistake, but my feelings for you are real. I love you." It was the first time he'd ever said those three words to you and yet it felt like a slap to the face rather than something you'd been dying to hear from him.
You turn away, trying to collect your thoughts. The pain is overwhelming, but so is the look of sincerity in his eyes, you hated him and yet you loved him all at the same time.
"Do you have any idea how humiliating this is? Everyone saw that screenshot. Everyone knows...People in class were staring at me, looking at me with pity!" You swallowed the lump in your throat as you shook your head,
"I know, and I'm so sorry," he says softly. "I'll do whatever it takes to make it up to you. I'll tell everyone the truth. I'll make sure they know how much I care about you, how real this is between us." You take a deep breath, trying to steady your racing heart.
"This isn't just about everyone else. You broke my trust and my heart, Changbin. I don't know if I can get past that." He looks at you, his eyes filled with regret as he realises just how badly he'd fucked this up between the two of you.
"I understand. But please, give me a chance to prove myself. Let me show you that what we have is real." But you just left him standing there, giving yourself space to think.
Eventually, you went back to him, deciding you wanted to try and make things work between you and it had taken months of hard work from him for you to finally trust him again.
HYUNJIN:
The wedding reception is in full swing, the joyous atmosphere filling the beautifully decorated hall. You smile as you watch your friends and family celebrating with each other, your gaze wandering over to your husband now who was talking to a few of his friends. Your wedding day has been everything you dreamed of and more, it was everything you'd ever wanted since you were a little girl.
As you move through the crowd, accepting congratulations and well-wishes, you overhear a conversation that stops you in your tracks, your hand resting on the lower back of someone who congratulated you but your mind is on the conversation.
"I can't believe it all started as a bet. Who would've thought he'd actually fall in love with her and have a wedding like this?" Your heart skipped a beat, and it felt as though someone had just doused you in freezing cold water. You step closer, trying to catch more of the conversation without drawing attention to yourself.
"Yeah, remember how smug he was about it? But now look at him, married and everything," Seungmin laughs and you suddenly feel like the ground has been pulled out from under you. Your wedding day, the happiest day of your life, suddenly feels like a cruel joke between everyone there. Did everyone know it was a bet? How could he have not said anything to you? The two of you had been together for nine years now and he hadn't thought it bring it up once?
You take a deep breath, trying to steady your racing heart, and decide you need to confront Hyunjin. Now.
As soon as you'd found him you dragged him away from listening ears and walked toward the toilets, shutting the door and ignoring the wolf-whistles from people who had seen the interaction. You bolted the door shut and Hyunjin smirked,
"Couldn't wait for the wedding night, baby?" He teases, stopping when you turn around to face him.
"Hey, what's up?" he asks, noticing the serious look on your face. He was ready to kill whoever had made you this pissed off on your wedding day of all days.
"We need to talk. Now," you say, your voice barely above a whisper. Where were you even supposed to start with this?
"Hyunjin, is it true? Did our relationship start as a bet?" you ask, your voice shaking as you stare at him. The expression on his face was all you needed for him to confirm it was real. His eyes widened in shock, and you see the guilt flash across his face.
"YN, I can explain—"
"All this time, everything we built, started as a stupid bet?" You whispered, almost as if you were scared someone was going to be listening outside.
"Yes, it started as a bet," he admits, his voice filled with regret. "But it changed, YN. I changed. We've been together for nine years! You think I'd marry you for some cruel joke?" He steps toward you but you take a step back, feeling betrayed.
"How could you not tell me? How could you let me marry you without knowing the truth?" You stared at him. As if your vows hadn't included that you'd never lie or hide something from one another.
"I was scared," he says softly. "Scared of losing you, scared that you wouldn't believe me if I told you. But my feelings for you are real. They have been for a long time, nine years baby I'd...I can't be without you." Tears fill your eyes as you struggle to process his words.
"How am I supposed to trust you now, Hyunjin? On our wedding day, of all days? You could have told me nine fucking years ago and I would...I would have had time to"
"I know," He whispers, his eyes boring into yours as he shakes his head.
"I know I fucked up. I should have told you a long time ago. But I love you, YN. I love you more than anything. Please, give me a chance to prove that to you. I meant every single thing in my vows...This isn't a joke to me," You needed to believe him and you did. Nine years was a long time for a bet and you knew it was real now but it didn't stop the hurt you were feeling right now.
"I don't know if I can just forget about this, Hyunjin. It hurts too much." You cry softly and he reaches out, wiping away the tears with a tissue trying not to ruin the makeup you were wearing.
"I understand," he says, his voice breaking. "But please, don't let this ruin what we have. We've built a life together, a future. Don't let a mistake I made years ago take that away from us." You take a deep breath, the anger and hurt slowly giving way to the love you still feel for him.
"It's going to take time, Hyunjin. I can't just move past this overnight."
"I know," he says, relief flooding his features, holding you in his arms as he whispers. "I'll do whatever it takes to earn your trust back. I promise." He rocks you back and forth slightly as he kisses the top of your head.
JISUNG:
The night was going amazing, you and Jisung were at your favourite restaurant, a cosy little place with dim lighting and soft music playing in the background. He told you he wanted to take you back to where your relationship started years ago, in the restaurant where you'd had your first date. He's been acting a bit nervous all night, and you have a feeling something big is about to happen, he'd made sure to let you know to get your nails done too...Jisung wasn't always the secretive guy he pretended to be.
"yn," He smiled as he reached over the table and took your hand. He looks into your eyes, a mixture of love and anxiety in his gaze, slowly he slides out from his chair and drops on one knee in front of you. Your heart racing as you giggled.
"I have spent every single day loving you for the last four years and I wanted to spend every single day for the rest of our lives doing it the same," He tells you. But just as he starts to speak again, you hear a familiar voice from a nearby table.
"Hey, isn't that Jisung and YN?" You glance over to see Changbin who is staring at you both and you look back at Jisung trying to focus on the proposal but the following words make your heart drop.
"Remember how she was just a bet years ago? And now look, she's about to be his future wife!" His voice was full of amusement and your heart stopped. The words cut through the romantic atmosphere like a knife. You pull your hand away from Jisung's and turn to face Changbin, the shock and hurt evident on your face.
"What?" You whispered, staring at Changbin and then to Jisung who looked panicked as he shook his head.
"YN, please, let me explain."
You stand up, your emotions boiling over as you knock into the table and knock the glass of wine shattering to the floor gaining more attention to you both.
"Explain what, Jisung? That our entire relationship started as a joke? That I was nothing but a bet to you?" You shake your head, trying to get away but he reaches out to you, desperation in his eyes.
"It wasn't like that...O-okay...Yes, it started as a stupid bet, but that was years ago!" You shake your head, tears starting to blur your vision, and people are staring at you both.
"How could you not tell me? How could you keep this from me all these years?" You whispered at him as he shook his head. His friends told him to tell you years ago when he started falling for you but he thought he could hide it. That if you never found out the way it started it wouldn't matter because you loved each other.
"I was terrified," he admits, his voice breaking as he shook his head.
"Scared of losing you, terrified you'd never forgive me. But I love you, YN. More than anything." The betrayal felt like a weight on your chest, suffocating you as you shook your head. You take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself.
"I need some air." You whispered and walked away.
You walked and walked until you stopped at a park, holding your arms around yourself and crying softly. It didn't take Jisung to catch up to you, calling your name, but you didn't look at him as your shoulders began shaking with silent sobs.
"YN, please. I never meant to hurt you. The bet was a mistake, a stupid, immature mistake. But my love for you is real. It always has been and it always...will be, baby." You turn to face him, the pain and anger still raw as you stare at him.
"How am I supposed to believe that, Jisung? After everything?" He knew it wasn't going to be something quick he could move past but he was never going to stop until he proved to you how true this was.
"Because I’ve spent every day since then trying to be the best man I can be for you. Because I can’t imagine my life without you. I was going to propose to you tonight because I want to spend the rest of my life proving to you how much I love you." You stared into his eyes, trying to decide if this was real or just some extension of the bet but he stared at you, his hurt and guilt clear on his face.
"You broke the trust between us...Everything feels like a lie now." You whisper, allowing yourself to hold onto him as he rubs your back softly,
"This isn't how I wanted this night to go...I fucked this all up, and I will do fucking anything to make you realise that what I feel is real..."
You take a deep breath, the anger and hurt slowly giving way to the love you still feel for him, you wanted your life with him. Your life with him was everything you'd been dreaming of.
"This...This isn't some part of the bet?" You gestured at the box in his hand and he shook his head,
"Never...Ever," He whispered as he looked at you, you nodded and he slowly knelt back down in front of you.
"I will spend every single day making this up to you if you agree to be my wife. I will spend every day, bringing you flowers, making you songs...doing whatever it takes to prove it's real...Will you-" You kissed him before he could even finish asking you and he whined.
"I-Is that a yes?" He panted as you pulled back from one another, you slowly nodded at him.
FELIX:
You and Felix are sitting in your favourite coffee shop, the one where you’ve shared many dates with each other when you started dating a few months back but something felt strange today. Felix seemed different than his usual self around you today and it was starting to worry you a little bit. He was being quieter, and more jittery than normal. You sip your coffee, waiting for him to speak, thinking he would come to you when he was good and ready.
Finally, he takes a deep breath, his eyes meeting yours but there is guilt and fear written all across his face as he stares at you,
“YN, there’s something I need to tell you.” You set your cup down, your heart beginning to race. Was he going to break up with you? Is that was this was?
“What is it, Lix?” You reached your hands over the table to touch him but he pulled his hands away and looked away from you for a moment, gathering his thoughts. The boys had warned him not to do this, that it wouldn't be good to ruin what you had but he no longer wanted to lie about why your relationship had started. When he spoke, his voice was shaky.
“Our relationship... it didn’t start the way you think it did..." He coughed a little as he cleared his throat,
"It started as a bet.” The words rushed out but you heard every single one of them as your heart sank to the pit of your stomach,
“A bet? What do you mean?” He winces at the hurt in your voice, he'd been trying to brace himself for this for a few weeks now but he hadn't done it enough.
“It was stupid and immature. Some of the guys bet that I couldn’t get you to go on a date with me. At first, it was just about proving them wrong. But YN, it didn’t stay that way. I’ve fallen for you, really fallen for you. That’s why I have to be honest with you now. I couldn't keep lying about why all of this had started.” One minute you'd been so in love with him and now it felt as though someone had ripped the floor out from under you,
“So, this whole time, I was just a game to you?” You whispered, shaking your head at him.
“No,” he says quickly, reaching for your hand again.
“You were never just a game. I know it started that way, but it changed. You changed me. When we went on that first date I knew I was going to fall for you and I made them stop the whole thing. I didn't take their money...” You pull your hand away, standing up trying to get out of the cafe without drawing too much attention to you both.
“How am I supposed to believe that, Felix? How can I trust anything you’ve said?” He stands too in a rush, knocking his cup over but neither of you moves, his eyes stare into yours, pleading with you.
“Because I’m telling you the truth now. I was scared to lose you, but I realized that if I kept this from you, it would be worse. I couldn’t keep lying to you. I love you, YN. That’s real. What I feel for you? It's so real.”
Tears blur your vision as you shake your head, the betrayal cutting deep inside of you as you shook your head, this all felt like a big joke.
“You should have told me sooner. You should have given me the choice...”
“I know,” he whispers, his voice breaking. “I’m so sorry. I’ll do what I can to make this right. Please, don’t walk away from us.” You look at him and bite your lip,
“I need time, Felix. This hurts too much.” You whispered as he nodded at you, watching you walk away from him.
One evening, as you sat alone in your dorm, there was a small knock on the door. Slowly you got up to open it and find Felix standing there, looking vulnerable and hopeful. There was a huge bouquet of flowers, not that you needed any more of them. There were already twenty of them sitting all around your apartment.
“YN, can we talk?” he asks softly. Slowly you stepped aside and let him into the apartment and he sat down watching you closely.
“I’ve been thinking a lot,” you say finally. “About us, about everything. I still don’t know if I can fully trust you, but I also know that I love you. I miss you.” Your voice cracked as he jumped up, rushing to your side and took your hand gently.
“I miss you too. I know I messed up, and I’ll spend every day proving to you that my love is real. No more secrets, no more lies.” You told him as you looked into his eyes, searching for the truth. All you see is sincerity and regret.
“It’s going to take time, Felix. A lot of time.” He nodded at you, kissing your hand softly,
“I understand,” he says, his grip on your hand tightening. “I’ll be here, every step of the way. I love you, YN. More than anything.”
SEUNGMIN:
It was a quiet and very lazy Sunday afternoon, and you’re curled up on the couch with Seungmin. He’s napping beside you, his head resting on your shoulder, and you’re idly scrolling through his phone, looking for the photos he'd taken of you both last week when you went to the animal sanctuary, you wanted to send them to your mum since she was always asking for photos. As you swipe through his videos, one catches your eye: a familiar group of friends, with Seungmin front and centre.
Curiosity piqued, and you tap on the video wondering what it could have been. The two of you had no secrets from one another, or so you'd thought.
The laughter and rowdy voices of Seungmin and his friends fill the room in the video. You recognize the setting instantly—it’s from a few months ago, just before you and Seungmin started dating. You knew that because it was the same outfit Seungmin had asked you out in, something you'd memorised.
"Alright, boys, here are the rules," Seungmin's voice booms from the video as people cheered around him, you frowned a little.
"The first one to get YN to fall for them wins. No cheating, and you have to actually date her for at least three months. Loser buys drinks for a year." You stared at the screen as if you wished it was some kind of nightmare you were having. But as you realise it was real your heart drops. The phone feels like it’s burning your hand, and you quickly pause the video. Seungmin stirs beside you, his eyes fluttering open.
“Hey, what are you watching?” he asks groggily, yawning a little before you scoff at him.
“Oh you know, just a cute little video of my boyfriend saying I'm a fucking bet,” you spit at him, showing him the screen and restarting to video all over again. His eyes widen in horror as he realizes what you’ve seen.
“YN, listen...I can explain.” He pleaded but you were already standing up, throwing his phone down onto the sofa beside him and trying to gather your shit.
“So, I was just a bet to you? Some kind of game? How long were you going to keep it going?” You laughed dryly. The video said three months but the two of you had been together for almost ten months now. Seungmin scrambles to sit up, panic clear on his face.
“No, it’s not like that. It started as a bet, yes, but that was before I really got to know you. I swear, my feelings for you are real.”
“How am I supposed to believe that? Huh? You sat there and you-” You barely got the words out, tears welling up in your eyes.
“You made me fall for you because of a stupid bet. I thought we had something real, Seungmin.” You grab your things, throwing them into a bag as he follows you around his apartment, blocking you from going into the bedroom,
“We do! We do have something real, baby! This is real!” he insists, standing and reaching out to you, but you move away from his touch and shake your head at him.
“I was an idiot, okay? It was juvenile and wrong, and I regret it every day. But YN, I fell for you. Truly. That’s why I need to be honest with you now.” You step back, the pain of betrayal cutting you like a knife and you shake your head.
"Send me the rest of my shit," You snap before storming out of his apartment and going home.
[X]
It had been a month, a month of pure torture every time you realised you still loved Seungmin despite him lying to you and hiding something huge from you and yet you missed him. Every single day you would get a new delivery of flowers or a teddy bear with a card that explained a reason why Seungmin had fallen in love with you and he was making it incredibly difficult to hate him.
"Seungmin," You breathed finding him at your door one more.
“I’m standing here, telling you the truth...okay,” he says, tears now in his eyes as he looks at you.
“I’m risking everything because I can’t lose you. I love you, and I’ll spend the rest of my life making this up to you if you’ll let me.”
You look into his eyes, searching for any sign of deceit and you can see how much he regretted doing this to you.
“It’s going to take time, Seungmin. I can’t just forget about this overnight...But I miss-" You barely had time to finish before he threw himself into your arms and hugged you tightly against him.
JEONGIN:
You’re having dinner at Jeongin’s family home, enjoying a relaxed evening with his parents and younger brother. They'd invited you over since you were Jeongin's first-ever real girlfriend and they wanted to meet the girl who had stolen his heart. The atmosphere is warm and lively, and it felt so easy to fit in with their banter. You feel completely at ease, having grown close to Jeongin's family over the months you’ve been dating. It would have been a year next month.
As you help clear the table after dinner, his younger brother suddenly speaks up,
“Hey, YN, what did you and Jeongin do with the money?”
"What money?" You laughed softly wondering what he was talking about, behind you Jeongin had paled dramatically.
"From the bet...The one he made to ask you out." his tone was so casual but his words were like a dagger to your heart.
The room falls silent. You freeze, the plates in your hands feeling like they weigh a ton and it took everything inside of you not to drop them on the floor. Slowly you turn to look at Jeongin, who is pale and wide-eyed, clearly caught off guard by the fact that his brother had bought it up.
“What's he talking about?” you ask, your voice barely above a whisper.
Jeongin's baby bother, oblivious to the tension he’s caused, continues,
“Yeah, Jeongin and his friends bet that he couldn’t get you to go to some party with him. It was just a joke, but I guess it worked out between you both, right?” You feel like the ground has collapsed beneath you. The warmth and comfort of the evening vanished, replaced by a cold, hard betrayal. You look at Jeongin, hoping for some kind of denial, but he just stares at you, guilt and panic written all over his face.
"yn..." He whispers but you place the plates down, shaking your head and heading out of the apartment needing some time to think clearly but it wasn't going to happen as Jeongin chased after you.
“YN, please, let me explain.” He begged but you stepped back, shaking your head. “Not here. We’ll talk about this at home.”
[X]
When Jeongin finally joined you back at home it was like the air was thick with tension and you stared at him,
“So, it was all a bet? Our entire relationship started as some kind of joke?” you demand, tears welling up in your eyes. Jeongin looks desperate, his hands trembling as he tries to reach for you.
“Yes, it started as a bet. But YN, it was a stupid, immature mistake. I never meant for it to go this far.”
“That’s supposed to make me feel better?” you shout, pulling away from him.
“I trusted you, Jeongin! I thought what we had was real.” You yelled at him and he shook his head at you,
“It is real,” he insists, his voice breaking. “I fell in love with you, truly. That’s why I never told you. I was scared of losing you. You mean everything to me, YN.” He pleaded with you.
"I never would have taken you to meet my family if I didn't love you. I wanted you to see them, to see the family that would one day be yours." You desperately wanted to believe him but everything was still weighing down on your chest.
“How am I supposed to believe anything you say now? How do I know this isn’t just another part of the bet?”
“Because I’m here, telling you the truth,” he says, tears streaming down his face.
"Because I'm hopelessly and dramatically in love with you. I would fly a plane and write it in the sky if I could! In fact! I'll hire someone to do it, I'll....I'll do anything, please, yn." He held your hands in his and you started at him, everything still so fresh.
"Innie..."
“I know, Yn, I fucked up but please...” he whispers, stepping closer cautiously.
“I’ll wait as long as it takes for you to deem me worthy of your forgiveness. I’ll prove to you that my love is real. No more lies, no more secrets.” You nod slowly, the anger and pain slowly giving way to the love you still feel for him, everything was real between you and you could tell that from his family but it didn't make it easy.
“Okay. But you have to be honest with me from now on. No more lies, ever.”
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imagine yandere! drider who makes himself at home in the corner of your room one day.
you come home from work, absolutely tired and just wanting to have a break... only to hear a weird scratching sound coming from your room. what the hell could it be? surely it's just your imagination? so you make your way towards your room nonchalantly, pushing the door open and...
"wha-?!"
"oh, darling."
you freeze, staring at this... absolutely gorgeous drider who had made himself at home in the corner of your room... you were originally going to let things be until you saw the many tiny babies on the back of his spider lower body. screaming and throwing your bag at him, you slam your door shut and run away from your room as fast as you could. shit, shit, shit! a spider dilf?!
...you were going to escape until you hit your toe and started crying on the ground. the drider came out of the room (with babies and all) and nursed you back to health.
and that was your first meeting with the hot asf spider dilf in your room.
you later learned that he was surprisingly gentle and didn't mean for you to be scared by his appearance. you wanted to tell him the truth. that well, you weren't scared by his appearance, sure, you were stunned when you saw this whole ass grown dude in your room but he was hot so it doesn't really matter. but rather, his kids scared the hell out of you with their tiny beady eyes. however... you're sure that if you said that, he'd try and kill you. you've seen how caring and loving he is with his tiny spider babies after all.
you've also come to learn that he really loves making intricate web designs. designs that absolutely sparkle when the light hits them in a certain way... they're all so beautiful and mesmerizing that you can't help but compliment him whenever you can.
"hey, your patterns are beautiful as usual dude."
"ah... thank you love."
he blushes, avoiding eye contact as he shakily pulls out a flower from behind his back. right, he's been giving you these gifts at random too. it's cute. well, not when he just started out though. he used to gift you dead rats.
you were horrified when you woke up one day and saw a dead rat on your desk. what the fuck?! your drider roomie didn't seem all too phased, even looking at you expectantly as he waits for a compliment. you had to explain to him that humans don't accept gifts like that. he looked rather deflated the rest of the day after that. talking about how his spouse must hate him and stuff. you didn't know he had a spouse.
you've also realized that he's weirdly overprotective of you.
you can't even go out on dates anymore. or... talk to anyone for that matter. he once threw your phone at a wall when he saw you texting this guy you were planning on meeting up. he also gets all pissy and starts making weird spider sounds while his children crawl around your feet. you were super grossed out by that at first but you've grown used to it by now.
"dude stop, i just want to go on a date!"
"no."
"why?!"
"you already have me! that's why!"
he gets all pouty, arms crossed over his huge tits as he nags you about trying to cheat on him. you never really said anything about that before. surely he's just roleplaying because you sometimes act like his lover by giving him food and asking how he is. but this has gone too far! you have to say something!
"we aren't dating, what are you on about?"
"yeah, because we're married."
what.
you stare at him, jaw dropping as his kids tug on your pants and chat noisily. did he just... say you guys were married? you try searching his face for any lies, only to be hit by the fact that he was serious.
that's when everything starts to suddenly fit together in your mind. the gifts, the name-calling, the fact that his kids love you... damn, maybe it was also because you complimented his webs that solidified his belief that you two were together. you read somewhere that male spiders make patterns to impress potential mates.
"um..."
"hmph! don't go on any dates anymore. i can't believe you keep trying to be unfaithful. our kids will be sad you know!"
damn it, looks like you got yourself a drider husband now.
#yandere#tw yandere#yandere x reader#yandere drabbles#yandere imagines#yandere scenarios#yandere concepts#yandere drider#yandere drider x reader#suiana brainrotting#suiana rambling
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